02 July 2026

Letter to My Lawyer

I’m hoping I can give you some further information soon, as I just found some more documents, but I wanted to note something that just happened at home. While I was sitting and reading on our back porch this afternoon, [my husband] came out and asked if I had filed for divorce yet. I replied that I hadn’t, that I had asked for a separation agreement to be prepared, but still needed some of the financial documents, like car loans and mortgage, to work on it. He told me that my car was paid off and that he had a meeting with his lawyer next week. He asked why I didn’t file it already, and I said that I was worried that it would trigger the sale of the house and I wanted to be able to look at other options. He replied that we could sell the house “anytime” and he didn’t care if the market was bad. This is concerning both from a financial standpoint and the stress it would cause to our younger child.

He then shifted the conversation and said we could just see if something could change about our relationship. I replied that I did not see our relationship changing, because he had not done the work of personal development necessary for us to relate as equals. At this point he asked me, sarcastically, “Is that why you decided to fall for someone else?” I denied his accusation and told him to leave the conversation and the space I was in. I followed him as he walked through the back door and he turned back around and shouted at me, pointing his finger, “Do not follow me!” while our preschooler was watching TV nearby. This was very much in the vein of him losing his temper at other times, and I felt very unsafe. He did leave the room and went into his own room. I told him by text that his accusation was an attack and created an emotionally unsafe environment. I also denied the accusation of infidelity to him in text, as well.

Thanks for making note of this, I have a long record of other emotionally distressing conflicts with him if that is something that has any bearing on the case.